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Truth be told, I don't like being asked, “What do you do?” because it's mostly just out of curiosity. I don't want to answer that, but I find myself in this dilemma all the time. And you're forced to spit out whatever nonsense you come up with. I always utter out of nowhere, I hate this endless loop.

People judge you based on what you do, as if it defines your entire life. And when you are not working or doing anything, you are either having the time of your life or wasting it. But, in reality, there is more to life than meets the eye. However, as we all know, the world does not run smoothly, and people believe what they believe to be correct.

I'm sick of having to explain everything to everyone. Every day, keeping my distance from everyone feels more and more comforting and safe to me. Being alone was strange at first, but it gradually enlightened me.

…And my honest answer is that I Am Breathing.

xx
ET

MAMA

Mama, for sure, was the very first word I said

Mama, saying it, is always a lingering sound

Mama, seeing you keeps me sane

Mama, being with you washes my pain

Mama, you are my core

Mama, with you, nothing can be torn

Mama, you are beyond words and worlds

Mama, you are a haven of love, you are my love

with love,

ET

I Am Trying

This hole in my chest appears to be unfixable. This hollow within me continues to sting, and I am pained to admit that it truly hurts me to bits. I desperately want to return to my purest heart, the one that was beating normally. But each step I take brings me closer to more pain.

But please know that I am trying, as I always do. But each time, it becomes more difficult. I'm losing my way; I'm losing it, and I'm losing myself repeatedly. And questions keep popping into my head as the nights grow darker and deeper.

Will I ever get out of this trance? Will I ever be able to see my shadow? Will I finally be able to see who I want to be? Will I ever be happy? I just want to be moved and move closer to whom I truly needed to be. I just never want to have to question myself. To return to the origins of my existence, to embrace my entire being.

xx

ET

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E.T. Breathes Blog | https://et-breathes.blogspot.com: ET-BREATHES.BLOGSPOT.COM is an outlet for the writer to document her journey. She expresses herself through art and writing. She hopes to reach out by sharing her story. E.T. - could stand for the writer's initials or an extraterrestrial being. Breathes - the act of living and existing. She is diving into the unknown, expressing her emotions and breathing. Join her in finding solace in the world of writing. And she hopes you will write to the universe as well.

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